The Heart of Valentine's Day

I find Valentine's Day to be a really strange 'holiday'.  I think the people who enjoy it the most are kids 10 and under and new couples.  While I was at the Shoprite today, I heard a few people wish each other a happy Valentine's Day - odd to me.

My 8 year old triplets think it's great - they decorated Valentine boxes for school and wrote out Valentines for their classes.  We attached a lollipop to each card, even though you're not supposed to send in candy because of food allergies.  The problem with that is if you are a parent who follows the rules, then your kid is looked at like a cheapskate for just giving out cards.  There are also always a few moms who put the rest of us to shame by making little Valentine goodie bags for their kid's classmates.  No way am I doing that for 75 kids, no matter how much my boys beg!

For a new couple, Valentines Day can make or break their relationship.  Young women are conditioned to want candy and flowers, a romantic card and dinner.  I've seen desperate men of all ages standing wide-eyed in the card aisle realizing that picking the right card is going to seal their fate for the rest of February.

My mother told me today that Valentine's Day annoys her.  I get it.  Practical, grown-up women realize that it's an over-hyped tradition - restaurants are crowded and rushed, roses are over-priced, candy is no good for us.  Sometimes we even tell our husbands not to waste their money.  We really don't mean it - who doesn't love flowers and a mushy card?

Then I think of my 88 year old grandmother on Valentines Day, her sweetheart long gone.  And single friends who can't help but feel like they're missing something.  Or mothers like me, who tonight will be doing the same things we do every other school night - homework, carting kids to activities, making dinner.

A few years ago, when all of the kids were finally in school full time, my honey and I finally seemed to find the right balance for Valentines Day.  We have a nice, leisurely lunch at a local restaurant and spend the afternoon together.  After school, we greet our 5 sweethearts with candy and dinner at home with a special dessert.  For me, that's the meaning of Valentines Day - spending it with my family who truly fill my heart with love and happiness.